Lose 10 pounds in one month! Better your Bikini Bod!! Drop a Jean Size in a Week!
As smart and skeptical as I usually am, I can be a sucker when I read the above diet promises that land in my email in box. Maybe diet nirvana is just a click away.
No matter how much I know about diets, eating right, exercise, I still hope there exists a magic bullet - just in case. A whole industry exists to tell us the same shit about how to lose weight over and over again - variations on the same theme. And we buy it - that's the really insane thing.
I think that instead of paying for the next secret diet gig, I should be on the other end and publish my own miracle sure fire plan. Because I believe I may have found it! Are you ready? Get your checkbooks out ladies........I may just write and publish what you all have been waiting for:
Diet Secrets of a Middle Aged American Turned Parisian
This actually is not a total joke. I am on a diet (so to speak) and though it includes nothing really new (do they ever?), it is actually working, sort of fun, not difficult and pretty sustainable in the face of danger (ie: living in the capital of bread, cheese, wine, pastries) at least so far. Since February 9th I have lost about 4 pounds and though nothing to write home about, it is a start. I have in fact devised a method. A combination of things actually. Honestly, this is what every diet you read about out there does - hasn't anyone noticed that the South Beach Diet looks strangely like the Atkins Diet which looks like a cousin to the Zone Diet all of who stole from the No Carb diet.................etc
If anyone is interested I may begin to chronicle my path here along with my other ramblings. What do you think? Middle aged, jobless, newly single American suffering from among other things, post menopausal redistribution of previously camouflaged fat, embarks on several missions impossible all at once.
Which one will she succeed at first?......or more depressingly put.......will she succeed at any of them?
Watch out Brigit Jones!
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